the pear incident

I woke up this morning with the sun shining on my face, jumped out of bed and put the stereo on. Lately I've been playing Phoenox in the morning if its sunny outside, just cause it gives me massive I-love-my-life feelings and I usually have a wee boogie whilst brushing my teeth. After that the day seems to go by much easier and I breeze through with a big smile on my face.
That is how today started.
I jumped in the car ready to drive the 2 hour trekk down to yet another small town. I'd brought some old cd's too so to keep myself busy. Since this morning was such a sunny and happy morning I had decided not to go for my usual Ane Brun cd, but instead opted for a real nineties indiepop flashback. Popsicle, The Wannadies and The cardigans Emmerdale all got stuffed in the bag and put in the car.
Got out on the motorway, the sun's shining, I'm wearing my new pink Chanel lipstick, got Princess playin on the stereo at the loudest possible volume whilst I'm screaming along, life is great. So far this is the best morning ever.
Started feeling a bit hungry after a while so I grope in my bag after a big juicy pear.

My friends usually laugh at me because my car is often in a right state, and can mostly only take passengers in the front beacuse the back is full of crap and workstuff. I basically live in my car. Sometimes it's been a blessing. For example when my friend S and I were going to the gym and she had left her socks behind. "Hang on! I think I might have a pair in the car!" Yep, there they were. Clean and all lying in the back amongst all the rubble. Or when another friend didn't want to wear her trainers to a fancy afterwork do "Hang on! You wanna borrow my red laquer heels? Theyre in the car!" Oh yes. Those ladies have my car to thank for a lot of good things that has come their way.

Back to the best morning ever. Since my car is in such a state I try to have a rubbish bag in the front for things like wrappers, parkingtickets and general litter. But fruits I usually throw out the window thinking there is some poor Bambi calling "Mo-o-other" roaming around feeling hungry. I got the passengerwindow down, and got ready to throw the hafeaten pear out. Since I'm driving at this point it was a bit difficult to aim properly..... Which is why I missed the open bit and instead hit the windowglass so hard the pear split in half and flew all over the seat, and the juices were running down on to the inside door handle. SHIT! I bloody had to throw it again. I've got one hand on the wheel and the other is desperately trying to find two soggy pieces of pear in a car that is like a bottomless pit. Loose something in my car and it is lost forever.
FOUND IT! Decided to throw it out of my own window instead, so I did. Which resulted in me getting hooted at by some lunatic in a shitty Renault AND given the finger when he overtook me.
"I WAS ONLY TRYING TO FEED BAMBI YOU BIG ASSHOLE!!!"

Quickly replaced Princess with Queens of the stone age and proceeded down the motorway with my happy mood gone, thinking I will NEVER eat another pear in my life! At least not in the car..